I was going through old photos and found this. I'm such a Patriot.

So Jodi set me up with his photographer for a new press pic. This guy was so gay he made Jodi look like a lumberjack.

Turns out in Japan Sumos eat babies...who knew.

For his next trick kids he's gonna swallow some sausage.

This cracks me up for some reason...

So the Fantastic 4 opens today. I was going to see it until somebody told me that Jessica Alba was the Invisible Girl. Really? That's some gutsy casting. I mean, I could see if she was Silent Girl or I-have-nothing-to-do-with-the plot-but-I'm-still-on-screen Girl but c'mon. Pretty much the only reason this movie will make a billion dollars in DVD sales is because of old perverts who don't understand how to use the internet yet.

Invisible? Why?

Another reason I love Japan, baseball mascots rape cheerleaders.

I'm gonna take the high road here and not talk about religion or politics. However I'm just going to point out that this statement is asinine "His physician said Falwell had a heart condition and presumably died of a heart rhythm abnormality." Abnormality? Ya, it was covered in cheese, thats a little abnormal I would say.

Some observations for the attached photo:

1. What about pouty-face up front? Does anyone else want to punch that kid?
2. Why is the man in the middle giving us "the Birdman?" Is that the new "are you a friend of Dorothy?"
3. None of these ladies has even begun to shave yet.
4. Do ANY of these pieces of garbage ever step back, look around at their crew, smell all the products, notice all of the conspicuously absent eyebrows, the tanning cream, the pink fabric, the open collars, and think, "Holy shit. We are SO gay that we have gone RIGHT THROUGH gay, BACK into straight, then BACK into gay again, and then PAST gay to female, and then to lesbian, then to BUTCH, then to new-age omni-sexual and then BOOM right back into gay again?"
5. Why don't dads hit their kids anymore? You see what happens, Safety Generation parents? YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS?

I'm not really sure how I should feel about the image below. The fat chick was clearly told to stay out of the picture for obvious reasons. However she still gets to hang out with four cute girls and maybe have some chance of landing some drunken frat boy who may confuse her for the couch. What do you think?